individual therapy
Many of my clients are skilled at thinking, analyzing, and strategizing. Logic is a powerful tool, but you may have reached a point where you can’t think your way out of how you feel. We don’t need to turn off your brain. We just need to connect it to the rest of you.
Jump to: Emotion | Structure | Queerness | Your Self | Community
the problem: the disconnect
From the outside, things might look perfectly fine. You may even be the one everyone else relies on to solve problems. But internally, that disconnect between your brilliant mind and your emotional life can feel overwhelming.
Does any of this resonate?
The Analyst Loop: You might find yourself replaying conversations or dissecting your past. You understand intellectually why you struggle, but the "knowing" hasn't brought you any relief.
The Performance: It can feel exhausting to constantly "keep it together." You might know exactly who you are supposed to be for others, but feel unsure of who you are when no one is watching.
The Fog: You might notice a strange sense of numbness or being "on autopilot"—watching your life through a pane of glass rather than truly feeling the joy, connection, or excitement you want.
The Intimacy Gap: You struggle to relax and be present with partners. It can feel easier to confuse sexual attention or performance with true emotional safety and connection.
You don’t need someone to just listen to you vent. You need a way to bring your head and your body back online together.
the approach: structural & investigative
A common fear is that therapy will force you to "stop thinking" or "just feel." We don't do that. We don't fire the thinkers; we give them a promotion.
My work is active and structural. We use your sharp analytical skills to map the system, so your mind feels safe enough to let your body speak.
1. We Recruit the "Hard Workers" Your analytical mind isn't the enemy; it's a protector. It has been working overtime to keep you safe. Instead of fighting your thoughts, we befriend them. We treat your internal Analysts, Managers, and Critics with respect. We acknowledge how hard they’ve been working to keep the ship afloat.
2. We Negotiate Safety We use talk therapy not to spin in circles, but to negotiate. Once your intellectual parts realize we aren't trying to silence them, they relax. They become willing to step back. This creates the safety required for us to move from "talking about feelings" to actually experiencing them somatically.
3. We Restore the Balance We use Internal Family Systems (IFS) to integrate the two halves of your system.
We use your Intellect to map the patterns and understand the history.
We use your Body to metabolize the emotion and release the trauma. The result isn't that you stop thinking—it's that your thinking becomes a tool you wield, rather than a cage you live in.
3. queerness is perspective
Answers from the edge.
Philosophy: Queerness is more than an identity. It’s a way of holding internal opposites without panic: masculine and feminine, science and mystery, order and wildness. Whether you’re LGBTQ+ or not, you were taught that to be acceptable, some parts of you had to be buried. Wholeness comes from inviting those parts back in and holding them with all the rest (even if they seem incompatible). Queer people were forced to learn this skill, but it is a radically effective technique available to everyone.
In Practice: Together, we audit the rigid “scripts” you were handed about who you should be (think gender, love, family, success) and help you write a life big enough for all your complexity. We practice disciplined "Both/And" to honor your need for safety and adventure, your logic and your magic. I track and mirror back your contradictions without letting you split until you can do it for yourself.
what this is
The capacity to hold two opposing truths at once without panic.
A radically affirmative zone for your sex, kink, neurotype, and loves.
An investigative map that finds the "missing data" located at the margins.
what this is not
Identity gatekeeping or telling you who you are.
Ungrounded idealism that ignores the forces and realities of being human in this world.
Performative allyship that signals safety without actually structuring it.
4. self is sacred
Reclaim the captain’s seat.
Philosophy: It’s helpful to visualize your internal world like the movie Inside Out, with distinct characters competing for the control console. Even in your most difficult moments, you are not broken. The high-performance team running your system is just fighting for control, often running on outdated protocols and manuals that no longer apply. But for the high-achiever, it’s not just simple emotions competing for the seat. Sometimes it’s a Perfectionist trying to prevent failure at all costs, an Editor trying to adapt your authenticity into something palatable, or a Firefighter trying to douse your stress with the quickest fix available. I honor their effort. They are working overtime to keep you safe. Even if you are judging them right now, trust me: the goal isn’t to fire any of them. It is to rediscover your true Self and promote You back to the captain’s seat, where the system stabilizes and transforms.
In Practice: I help you move from harsh self-discipline to Self-leadership. We do this through guided visualization, somatic tracking, and reshaping your internal dialogue. I apply my background in organizational leadership and a puzzle-solver's precision to map your internal boardroom. Together, we identify exactly what your parts are protecting. I reflect back your competing motivations so you can practice hearing them simultaneously, rather than being hijacked by them one at a time. As you discover what it feels like to step back from the chaos, I facilitate a trust-building negotiation between You (your core Self) and your team. When your parts realize they don't have to white-knuckle the controls anymore, they relax. The internal noise quiets down, and you regain the energy you used to burn on conflict.
what this is
Moving from harsh self-control to compassionate Self-leadership.
Turning inner enemies into valuable allies with a "no bad parts" policy.
Stopping the energy drain of constant internal conflict.
what this is not
Bypassing or ignoring the difficult feelings to get to the "good" ones.
Rigid dogma that forces a framework onto your unique system.
Shaming your defenses for doing the job they were hired to do.
5. community is healing
The ground you heal on.
Philosophy: Isolation is the wound, and connection is the cure. The high-achiever’s default setting is to solve problems alone, to "fix" themselves in private before letting anyone see the messy work. I interrupt that impulse. We are harmed in relationships, and we must heal in them. You cannot think your way out of relational patterns in a vacuum. Your "too-muchness," your shame, and your grief metabolize fastest when witnessed by eyes that don’t look away. Belonging isn’t a reward you earn at the end of healing, it’s the ground we practice on.
In Practice: In couples work, polycules, families, and process groups, I create structured spaces, not performance circles, where we can practice rupture and repair in real-time. When parts collide and loops form (i.e., your shutdown triggers his panic, which then triggers your rage, and so on…), I act as the strategic interpreter and circuit breaker. I slow down the lightning-fast reactions and translate "protector moves" into language each of you can understand, guiding you each inward to be with your Self and system. This allows your systems to move from reactive conflict to deep, systemic understanding as each of you becomes in charge of managing your own internal teams.
What this is
An anti-isolation, pro-belonging environment.
Structured group process building real skills like repair and attunement.
A place to practice being seen without performing.
What this is not
Call-out culture or public shaming.
Spectator therapy where you just watch others work.
A lonely journey disguised as healing.